4 Reliable Tips For Dating At Any Age came about during my online dating journey…

I hadn’t dated in a few years and I was ready to date again. Labor Day Weekend 2015, I asked a sister of Alexa’s teammate to help me get signed up on Tinder! Which was crazy for me! I was always adamant about not doing the online dating thing! I must say that the whole process of swiping left or right was actually fun! My friends loved helping me decide which way to swipe! By the time I’d met my husband in December 2015, I’d talked to and/or met around 25 men in less than 4 months. I was kind of busy! And my friends couldn’t wait to hear the stories about the “tinder” men! The good news… I met my husband on Tinder in December 2015!

Other than my husband, the only guy I gave a second date to was Tinder Guy #2. You see, I needed to make sure I could trust my instincts! The reason…I’d already dated a guy that was manipulative and controlling, (see that story here.) So I was a little skittish about dating!

Calming My Fears

During the second date with Tinder Guy #2, I confirmed my decision that I just didn’t think he was right for me. In fact, I was so pleased with myself about being right that I must’ve smiled way too much! Yes, I think he thought I was into him…YIKES! He walked me to my car and leaned in to kiss me. I almost gave myself whiplash because I turned my head so fast! But not fast enough because he did catch me on the cheek! Whoops!

I said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m just not there.” Of course, he apologized. And, I told him that I’d just started dating again and I wanted to keep looking. Although he was a nice guy, he just wasn’t for me! Certainly, I felt bad that I might’ve given him the wrong impression! It definitely wasn’t my intent to mislead him.

But, that’s kind of how dating works, right? You either both like each other, only one of you likes the other, or neither of you like each other. And, it’s Okay! There’s absolutely no reason to settle or force a relationship. And, WHY? Why would you want to? I mean if you have to constantly chase him, cry about the fact that he isn’t that into you, or fake being into him just so you won’t be alone? Stop It! That’s desperate behavior! And girl, you’re not desperate! Not every guy is “The One!”

You might be wondering why I didn’t give Tinder Guy #1 a second date? Well, you see he showed up overserved. Therefore, he got deleted immediately! Oh, well!

Here you go…

4 Reliable Tips For Dating At Any Age

1. Value Yourself – You Are Enough. You Are Worthy. You Are Complete! So…You deserve to be someone who knows your value! If “he” doesn’t, then…Thank You, next!
2. Check Yourself – Have you ever met an overly possessive, emotional guy…RED Flag. They say the “L” word way too soon, they try to consume all of your time and you’re flattered because you think that means they love you like no one ever has! Newsflash…Control is not a synonym for love! It means they’re controlling and you’re no longer allowed to think for yourself! They’re the martyr in all past relationships. Nothing is ever their fault. They don’t want any guys looking at you (as if you can control who looks at you! I mean damn girl! You look good!),…Don’t be flattered by this behavior! It’s an indication of a controlling, manipulative person. R U N……
3. Pace Yourself – If the relationship feels good/right, great! But, utilize wait time…which is about 3 months before deciding he’s the ONE! There’s an old saying, “Leopards can’t hide their spots.” It’s true! A person can pretend to be who you want/need them to be for about 3 months, and some even longer than that! Then, their true personality starts oozing out. You probably get a glimpse of the true personality within the first 3 months. And, you may make excuses for things they do because you’re caught up in the newness of the relationship. And, so is the guy! But that will wear off and you’ll be like, Woah! Pump the breaks! Don’t change yourself to keep a relationship going! And don’t make excuses for behavior/habits that go against what you believe and who you are as a person.
4. Trust Yourself -Always listen to your gut instincts! Instincts are rarely wrong! You got this!

What advice would you give someone about dating?

After thought…

Note…My husband said that I should let you know that men can give these same tips about women. And yes, they can! There are women who want to control, manipulate, change, and take up all of a guys time. And there are women who want the relationship to move fast and ignore the wait time because they’re afraid they’ll lose the guy if they don’t throw out the “L” word soon enough! Don’t! Ladies if you feel the need to do this, he’s not the one for you!